Banana Chocolate Chip Pancakes, Scrambled Eggs, Coffee with Vanilla Caramel Creamer
This morning I woke up at 6:45 voluntarily and went over and cooked breakfast with Meg and then ate with her and Valerie. It was really good. Plus, it helps me wake up. What’s on the schedule for today? I work at supervisor from 12 until 1:20. Then, I’ve got a stats exam from 1:30 until 2:50. After that, I’m going to jump in my little car and drive down to Bittersweet. It’s been way too long since I’ve been snowboarding and I’m jonesin. We’ve got a little bit of fresh snow, too. Not a ton, but at least it won’t be ice shards, right?
Yesterday, I picked up my comparative anatomy exam. I actually got an 80% so I wasn’t all that disappointed. It was much better than what it felt like. Hopefully, it will only get better. Rachel and I have our dissection demo on Monday. “Muscles of the caudal hip…” Demoing on a small, small pig.
So, Meg and I are leaving next Friday for our road trip. We’re heading to Cleveland the first night, where her Dad has eagerly volunteered to make us dinner…even if we do show up at 8:30 p.m. The next day, we’ll finish the drive to Mohonk Preserve which is near New Paltz, New York. We’ll either go skiing that day or the next. Hunter Mountain, Catamount, and a few others are close and have some decent length runs. It’ll be fun to get in the Catskills. Well, we’re spending Saturday and Sunday night in the Mohonk House. Apparently there is some really cool mountain house that we can hike/snowshoe to while we’re there and some waterfalls (that should be frozen at this point). So, yes, it will be great. Then, we are cutting through Canada and will spend the night at Meg’s cousins’ house. They live outside Detroit. On Tuesday, we’ll finish the last couple hours of the trip and make it back to Hope with plenty of time.
Then, the next weekend, I am going home!!! I am so excited. I’ll be a week or two late for Josie’s birthday, but at least I’m going to get home (God-willing). Abbi and Dan also got a new Pit Bull…they call him Biggie or Biggins or something goofy…but he is a beautiful little brindle. I’m glad for her though and trying really hard not to be jealous. I want my dogs with me.
I had my first interview last night. Due to the fact that it’s through the Army Corps of Engineers, they can’t hire or deny anybody until March 1st. That’s alright though, because I’d really like to hear back from a few other positions and research spots before then. The job I interviewed for last night is in Northeastern Montana and and I would be spending 90% of my days in the field on a boat…or sea-doo once it gets warmer looking for terns and piping plovers. NOT BAD. I’d also get to spend a week or so in North Dakota doing training.
Alright. I’m going to go workout. Have a good day. :) <3
It doesn’t always have to be heavy. I find that that’s when I write the most. I’ve noticed that more and more these past few months.
But today is light… Will Ferrell might call it “child’s play.” I took an anatomy exam…that didn’t go so well, but I prepared for hours and hours this weekend so it’s hard to be too upset. Animal Behavior – tetras and zebras in a small tank for two hours…need I say much more? Capstone wasn’t even taught by our professor today. Very easy. I like that group–we’re just a class of friend’s struggling to figure out what they heck we are going to do after this demanding four years at Hope College…from hopeful M.D. applicants to global health activists to the dental kids, the one who decided he wants to take the business route now, the field research hopefuls, the interpretative ones and then the ecology-lovers, me.
Yes, light. I ran for half an hour, did abs, then tried to kill my arms. I still need to get in the shower. I love the Monday to Tuesday transition. I’m done with class at five o’clock on Mondays and my next class isn’t until 1:30 on Tuesday. It’s beautiful.
My first interview (this season anyways) is in about 43 hours. Oh, I found out I don’t get to go home this weekend. I was so disappointed. Unfortunately, my partner and I are scheduled to do the dissection demo on Monday the 8th and due to the fact that the Super Bowl is on Sunday, there’s no chance in heck my professor is coming in Sunday night to help us. I appreciate Rachel trying to work around my schedule though…but again, she has things she has to be at on Friday, so that won’t work either. I really want to get home soon. I’m not homesick, but I haven’t wanted to go home this badly in a while.
On a positive note, with an $11.25 purchase off of the internet, my car-fixing-up project is now complete. One of my heat/air conditioning knobs has been falling off and I got a new one in the mail today. She’s got brand new tires on her, a new front right wheel bearing, new air filters and about 2,900 miles before her next oil change now. She’s finally back to sounding like the day I bought her. I’m pretty grateful–for safety mostly.
Well I love you. I told you this was light. My grandpa always says “No news is good news.” Today, I will definitely take that.
Today started off frantically and awful and ended on a good note. It was much better than yesterday and the news yesterday brought along with her. Plus, Mondays are just hard. I’ve got seven hours of class including two labs, one of which starts at 7:30 and leaves me smelling like anatomy…pig anatomy. I’m happy to say that after a long shower, some food, and an hour to calm down, I was good to go. It’s hard to be at class at 7:30 when you wake up at 7:31…also very coincidental that I did wake up then. Thank goodness.
I’m going to try to live boldly, purposefully and as I am this week and in the upcoming ones.
I’m heading home on the weekend of February 6th. The weekend of the 13th, I’m road-tripping to the mountains of New York. :)
I wish you all love. Some boldness. Some smiles. Some new friends. Some good old ones. Some new possibilities to hope for. Mostly love.
I don’t want to sit and type some recently heard upbeat song lyrics to put that grin in your mind.
I don’t want to get up to turn the heater up, even though it wouldn’t be unreasonable considering I turned it way down when I had the house to myself this weekend. I think it’s stayed.
I don’t want to do anything, but sit and think. I want to wear warm and comfortable clothes and sit to the left of my little black lamp. Every once in a while, I want to look at the street lights. There’s just a little problem with that, depending on how hard I focus on focusing. I keep seeing my reflection in the pane.
I want to keep listening. Tonight’s a night when I’ll let myself block everything out. Maybe that’s not it. Maybe I just want some quiet and sometimes the closest thing you can get in a house like this is a better sound to cover up the rest.
I want the sadness to stop. I wanted a miracle for her tonight. I want my 11 year old sister to not watch a young girl be killed today. I want her to have the childhood I was blessed with. I want David and Emma to be here. I wish Kimmy love and mostly that things could have just been different and she could have been loved like she loved. May they rest in that state of eternal Shalom and where things are fair, what they should be. Just rest in it. And heal.
I want her to stop talking about weight. Comparing “nows” to “what they used to be” when I’m bigger than either hurts and bothers me. The frustrating thing about it all is that I’m not the one with the problem…more of a bystander, wanting to help, but at the same time taking the indirect backlash of it all.
Some days I cherish youth so much. Other days, or nights, like tonight, I want that fireplace down the road.
I tried to take a walk tonight because I wanted to, and it was so cold and I wasn’t dressed fittingly.
I can handle Stats 311 and 312, I decided.
My ArcGIS class will be fine too if dear Rod doesn’t put me to sleep during the lecture portion.
____
I’m sort of sick of working and that’s a huge understatement. I think I’m going to head up to Caberfae on Thursday if we go to Bittersweet on Saturday or Sunday. But, my dad might be coming down to Holland for the first time since freshman year I think, so snowboarding may have to wait until Sunday or next weekend. I’m still pretty set on Thursday either way.
Today, I talked to the mailman. I’m not sure how, but he recognized me from basketball last year. I think that’s kind of funny and awesome of him considering my hair is 35 shades darker and I was in real girl clothes. Oh, not to mention the fact that I wasn’t exactly hitting the hardwood for a huge amount of time–mostly just stuck to the pine ;) . Anyways, he’s nice. He doesn’t work on Thursdays.
I went snowshoeing today at ODC with Meg. We checked out the rescued birds. They’ve got a Golden Eagle, Barred Owl, Peregrine, Red-tailed Hawk, Kestril, Merlin, two Bald eagles and another owl. I may be forgetting some. Out of all of them only one hadn’t been hit by a car.
I found out that I have senior status today. Unfortunately, that means that spring semester of my true senior year (if I need to take classes that semester) I will lose out on 2,000 dollars from the Federal SMART grant program. That’s not entirely awesome considering they obviously didn’t take into consideration that I was a junior early. So, I didn’t get the $2,000 dollars for that semester. It’s sort of a bummer, but it won’t affect me until Spring of 2011. Hopefully, something else will work itself out by that point. It’s just weird that because I’ve got extra credits under my belt, I get money cut from me. Intuitively, it doesn’t make that much sense to me. It’s like punishment for taking the Advanced Placement courses in high school.
Today was good.
As always, love.
Someday soon I’ll probably just say it. :) It’ll probably be awkward and wonderful with its lack of pretense. And definitely in person. It deserves more than a social networking site.
Set the scene:
Two in the morning. 14th street. It’s not snowing anymore, but only hours ago it was. It’s one of those completely peaceful nights. And, you have enough clothes on that you’re not cold even though it’s only in the mid-30’s. Those Chronicles of Narnia street lamps are on– setting free that comforting yellow and illuminating just enough of the fluffy white below it to lead you to the next little fire-orb comfortably–no more than necessary. The streets are empty, save for the few cars that will probably receive street tickets at about three in the morning. But of course, I’m walking east. You’re facing north, as is only natural. Of course you say “Hello”…and you probably say the whole word, too. That’s you. Your eyes are always so alive. I don’t know if it’s the innocence or the childish joy (perhaps, the same thing) or plain courtesy. But, for some reason, I don’t think you put on a show for courtesy’s sake on an empty street. Then, I just say it. The fun part is not knowing the rest of the story. I’m fine with whatever as long as you understand how I mean it. For some reason, I feel like no response could be fun. Just say it and turn back east. Head home. No biggie. Except, I’m being completely honest.
______
It’s Saturday night.
I’m at home alone watching (well was anyway) Professional Bull Riding.
It’s bothering me, but at the same time it’s not bothering me too much.
Except, I don’t know what to do with myself. Campus is still empty. Luckily, it’ll start filling back up tomorrow.
______
I look forward to seeing you.
Love, my friends.
Holland is white. White, white, white. We’ve been getting absolutely pounded (maybe that’s extreme) with snow lately. My car probably has 10 or so inches on it.
Today’s Day 5 out of 7 in a row working at the Dow. It’s alright though. I’ve been getting a decent amount done and figuring out plans for this semester and doing applications for this summer. Sometimes though, it is incredibly boring. It’s way worse when I don’t pick up wireless.
School starts back up on Tuesday. I think the only classes that I’ll have that day are Math 311 – Stats Methods and GES something – my G.I.S. class. I’m looking forward to that one because it’s a bunch of friends…late on Tuesday nights. Seems like it will be pretty low key. Other than that, I’ve got Bio 3somethings – Animal Behavior, Comparative Anatomy of Vertebrates (dissecting dogs, horses, fish, snakes, that sort of thing…), and the Capstone class, which is all about careers or something…It’s one credit. Not a big deal. So, I’ve got 9 credits of straight biology, 4 credits of math, and 2 of geology/earth science type stuff. Should be pretty hard, but interesting.
Anyways, I need some coffee.
:)
Hope your day is nothing short of awesome. Je t’aime et au revoir.
Il vaut mieux faire que dire.
I think that much too often we pick one flaw in a person and let that dominate our perception of them. I’m really angry with myself when I catch myself thinking that way. I do it. I hate that I do it, but it happens. I don’t like that it does.
Somebody can work so hard, try to do right, have good intentions, and genuinely act out of love. But, sometimes there’s one character flaw that just sets you off about them. Then, the next time you see them, your thought process isn’t “There he or she is. I love them. They love me. They’re doing what they can. We all have faults.” Instead, it’s something along the lines of “Ugh. They always ________. I’m so mad or angry or annoyed by them.”
It’s weird. Little flaws.
Like we’re just perfect or something.
Haha. Heck no. Think about the little flaws you know you have. What if those little flaws completely distorted and dominated the perceptions of those that you love about you. You’d sure be in a hole, right? But, you’re not a bad person, right? You’re not actively trying to make them angry or hate you, right?
This is why Love Wins.
____
From Church back home last Sunday:
Ephesians 2:10.
We are not “junk.”
Nor are we mistakes.
Or a great big designed-by-God “oopsie.”
So, let’s embrace the good we’ve got, the talents we were given, the beauty (in each and every little single, sometimes quirky way) we had poured upon us, and the lovin’ we were meant to do, right?
It’s a lot easier handing out the love when you’re not so busy hating yourself. And, I’m pretty sure that’s why we’re here. To love and be loved.
I’ll admit, I’ve been listening to some popular radio lately. Kris Allen says it: “We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em while we got the chance to say…”
Dad and Mom – thanks for doing everything for us. I love ya.
Abbi, Josie, Maddi, you mean more to me than you could ever know. I love you guys so much.
Abbie and Abby thanks for being the best. Love you.
We’ve all got crazy issues or little things we do that peev everyone else, but we “ain’t junk.”
So, he’s up in front of the class talking for instance. Whatever he’s talking about, it’s of relatively little importance, is holding everybody’s attention for some reason. Truth be told, though, it’s not that exciting. Wanhwanhwanh, right? Then he says something completely inappropriate, or psychotic, or goofy as heck. You catch it and your eyes shoot to everybody else, but they don’t seem to have noticed. But, then there’s one person who makes eye contact with you and they are trying just as hard or even harder than you not to burst out laughing.
Conversation starter. You could be tight one day. That’s one way. That’s the fun way.
Other times, there’s no eye contact. Somebody says something that’s completely horrible (even unintentionally) and you see somebody’s head and eyes drop, like they’re hurt. They have no idea that anybody saw that expression on their face or in their shoulders. They may not have even realized they did it. But you did.
There’s a connection. Perhaps, you’ve got similar backgrounds.
Sometimes, I think that the expressions you catch somebody making before they realize that they made it can tell you way more about a person than conversation or their actions when they know they’re being watched. It’s hard to catch anymore though. We’re such a socially intensive society. Reality TV? What a joke. That is the perfect counter-example of what I’m thinking.
This isn’t meant to be sad. How about those childish smiles you catch somebody making? Complete innocence…just pure joy. No pretense. Or, a mildly humorous roll of the eyes when the boss decides to go on a power-trip? Unseen, except for by you.
I’m having a really hard time finding the energy to pack up right now. I’ll probably leave around noon to head back to Holland. I have to work at 11 o’clock on Tuesday morning, and I really don’t want to stress and try to get there in one morning. I think the weather is supposed to be fairly good for the drive this time. It has been so cold lately–negatives and single digits for the past few days. It’s really uncomfortable on the face.
Yesterday, I hung out at my mom’s place. I was going to go snowshoeing, but it was way too cold to keep the face comfortable. Today, I went to church with my sisters and my mom. Now, I’m at my Dad’s house. The girls head back to school tomorrow, so Maddi’s already sleeping. I came down to my room to pack, but I can’t get started, dang it.
I’ve been busy applying for a bunch of research programs and research field assistant positions around the country, so wish me luck! I’d love to make some money and play outside again this summer. Throw in a road trip and some new friends (not that mine aren’t stellar…I love you guys, but you guys were new at one point, too, right?) and it’s bound to be an awesome summer. I’d love to get back into the summer swing of things. I miss kayaking all of the time and running around barefoot in my shorts and a cut-off. And, if I tried to eat a meal outside right now, it’d be bound to freeze before I finished. Snowshoeing, snowboarding, actually appreciating heat, and romping in the snow are all great, but when your face is so frozen you can’t talk correctly, it kind of sucks.
Alrighty, I should try to do something productive so I get a decent amount of sleep before the 312 mile drive tomorrow. Good night for now.
